Five Excuses That Kill Accountability-with Doug Dickerson

February 19, 2015 Liz Stincelli 1 Comment

“The problem that we have with a victim mentality is that we forget to see the blessings of the day. Because of this, our spirit is poisoned instead of nourished.” – Steve Maraboli

As a leader there are few things more important than creating a strong and healthy organizational culture for your employees to thrive in. It’s up to you as the leader to be proactive and take the lead in developing the organizational climate you wish to have.

Unfortunately, many harmful behaviors threaten the fabric of the culture that you are trying to create. These behaviors include bullying, manipulation, office politics, etc., and they each pose a real threat. But there is one in particular that we would like to address – so here is our question: Is a victim mentality preventing accountability in your organization?

No doubt there are accountability measures in place within your organization that serve to track performance and measure each person’s progress. Accountability measures are healthy and necessary and keep everyone focused on shared goals and outcomes.

But what happens when a team member perpetuates a victim mentality? What does it sounds like? Here are five common claims that will give you some insight.

It’s not fair

The “it’s not fair” mantra is perhaps the oldest one in the book. It can be used when an employee feels that his or her work has gone unnoticed, was passed over for a raise or promotion, or has made an improper comparison of the value of their work in relation to a colleague. Whether justified or not, this feeling of being on the receiving end of unfair treatment is a source of concern. As a leader it is up to you to address it. Accountability makes sense when each person on the team has a clear picture of the value they bring to the organization. Don’t let an employee’s feelings of being slighted go unanswered. When they see and understand their importance they will not see accountability as a threat.

Finger pointing

Finger pointing is so destructive because it’s so easy. It’s the first gesture of the least accountable. Yet sadly, the blame game is alive and well. But clear expectations of employee performance along with useful accountability guidelines will go a long way toward bringing an end to finger pointing and fault-finding. As a leader, you must take ownership of these expectations. When employees can build a collaborative team environment around the idea that “we are in this together”, it can unleash everything that is good and creative about your people. Finger pointing now gives way to mutual accountability, and fault-finding takes a back seat to an “I’ve got your back” mentality. Which would you rather have?

It’s Not My Job

When employees have the mindset that they are only responsible for specific, outlined tasks, it is easy for them to dodge accountability with the simple statement, ‘it’s not my job’. The most effective organizations are the ones where everyone has the opportunity to make an impact. As a leader, you must create a culture of collaboration and teamwork where everyone feels they have a vested interest in the outcome. Let employees see you roll up your sleeves and do what needs to be done regardless of your formal job description. Achieve accountability by replacing the mindset of ‘it’s not my job’ with ‘I benefit when everyone participates as a whole’.

Feeling Powerless

Employees will not take accountability for decisions or tasks which they feel they have no control over. As a leader, you must provide employees with pertinent information and encourage them to ask questions. Then, give them the power to make decisions and design how their work gets done. Accountability will increase dramatically when employees are given power and control over their own work.

Denying Responsibility

Employees often deny responsibility out of fear or frustration. They fear the repercussions for failure or they are frustrated by a lack of clear expectations and control over their work. As a leader, you must create a team mentality. Help employees understand that when one team member fails to carry their weight, they drag down the performance of the whole team. Inspire in them shared values and clearly communicate expectations. Teach problem solving and creative conflict resolution skills throughout your organization. Increase accountability by removing the fear of failure and building employee confidence by giving them a sense of control.

As a leader, it is your responsibility to develop a culture that encourages accountability and discourages a victim mentality. If your employees willingly accept accountability for their decisions and actions, your organizational effectiveness will skyrocket.

Doug Dickerson is an internationally recognized leadership author, columnist, radio host, and speaker. He is the author of two books, Leaders Without Borders, 9 Essentials for Everyday Leaders, and Great Leaders Wanted! Follow him at www.twitter.com/managemntmoment. He lives just outside beautiful Charleston, SC. To invite Doug to speak email him at managementmoment@gmail.com

Elizabeth Stincelli is passionate about recognizing and inspiring the leader in each of us. She is the CEO of Stincelli Advisors where she focuses on helping organizations engage employees and improve organizational culture. Elizabeth holds a Doctor of Management degree with an emphasis on organizational leadership.

Learn more about Elizabeth by visiting her website, stincelliadvisors.com and connect with her on Twitter @infinitestin, Google+, and LinkedIn. You can contact her by email at stincelliadvisors@gmail.com

Action, Confidence, Engagement, Success, Vision

Taking Action

February 12, 2015 Liz Stincelli

“Action is the foundational key to all success.” —Pablo Picasso

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Why Take Action?

Success is about action! It’s not what you know, who you know, or how lucky you are. It’s about what you do with what you have, where you are, right now. Taking action is a conscious choice. No one has ever achieved success by accident; every successful person made the decision to take action. Don’t know where to start; start by developing a clear vision for your future, decide what you must do to get there, and then take action. Not only is it important for you to motivate and discipline yourself to take action, but also to inspire others to act. Taking action become easier once you have a clear vision, authentic engagement, and confidence.

Vision

The Dalai Lama said, “In order to carry a positive action, we must develop here a positive vision.” What is your vision? What action can you take, that if done repeatedly, will result in you realizing that vision? Can you inspire others to take action with you? Learn to see the opportunities, in every situation. How can you use them to achieve your vision? Get others on the bandwagon; encourage them to contribute their great ideas and strategic thinking to your vision and plan for achieving it. Get specific with your vision; see it, and then go for it.

Engagement

It is easier to take action if you are engaged. Jack Welch stated, “An organization’s ability to learn, and translate that learning into action rapidly, is the ultimate competitive advantage.” Jack Welch’s comment applies on an individual as well as an organizational level. Engage yourself and others in envisioning new ideas, innovating, developing a strategy, and collaborating. Inspire the passion in yourself and others that lights the fire of action. Create an authentic connection to you goals and then become fully engaged in taking action.

Confidence

Dale Carnegie believed, “Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go get busy.” In order to take action, you must overcome your fear, complacency, and disengagement. This does not mean that you will not feel these things, only that you will not let them dictate your choice to take action. Taking action becomes easier once you develop the confidence you need to take risks and confront challenges head-on. Build your confidence; take action.

Taking Action

Joel Barker told us, “Vision without action is merely a dream. Action without vision just passes the time. Vision with action can change the world.” What is your vision? Can you see it? Now, how are you going to achieve it? Only through action can your dreams become real. Move yourself and others to take action. Start by creating a compelling, clear vision. Then light the fire of passion and engagement. Finally, grow your confidence. The one thing that separates those who achieve their vision from those who do not is action. Take action today!

Elizabeth Stincelli is passionate about recognizing and inspiring the leader in each of us. She is the CEO of Stincelli Advisors where she focuses on helping organizations engage employees and improve organizational culture. Elizabeth holds a Doctor of Management degree with an emphasis on organizational leadership.

Learn more about Elizabeth by visiting her website, stincelliadvisors.com and connect with her on Twitter @infinitestin, Google+, and LinkedIn. You can contact her by email at stincelliadvisors@gmail.com.

Accountability, Culture, Leadership, Organizational Culture

Barriers to Employee Accountability

February 5, 2015 Liz Stincelli 2 Comments

“Accountability breeds response-ability.” —Stephen Covey

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

What is Accountability?

Accountability seems to be this all-encompassing, nebulous word. Ask ten people what accountability means to them and you will get ten different answers. Accountability boils down to taking ownership of one’s own thoughts, words, actions, and reactions. You are not a victim in this world, don’t act like one; and don’t foster a culture of victim mentality in your organization. So, what are some of the barriers to accountability that you should be looking out for?

Lack of commitment

Vince Lombardi believed, “Individual commitment to a group effort – that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work.” What is the level of commitment in your organization? Lack of accountability is directly related to a lack of commitment. So, how can you boost the commitment levels of your employees? Effective organizations have teams where everyone feels they have influence. When people feel like their voice is being heard, their investment in their work increases. Also, you must set and communicate a clear vision and direction so your employees know where you are going and what needs to be accomplished. How does each of your employees fit into your plan for success? The commitment level of your employees will drastically improve if they know the organization is going somewhere meaningful and that they are valued for their contribution to the overall success.

Lack of ownership

Mary Barra explained, “What I always say is, ‘Do every job you’re in like you’re going to do it for the rest of your life, and demonstrate that ownership of it’.” Do your employees feel a sense of ownership of their work? One of the greatest barriers to accountability stems from how much control people feel they possess over their work. When employees are in control of the “what, when, and how” of a decision or action, their ownership and accountability skyrockets. When people feel that others are in control of how their work gets done, accountability decreases significantly. So, how can you increase the level of ownership your employees take of their work? Simply put, if you want people to be responsible you must clearly define the results you want them to deliver and then let them have control over how they deliver them.

Lack of resilience

Gever Tulley said, “Persistence and resilience only come from having been given the chance to work through difficult problems.” How confident are your employees in their ability to work through difficult problems? How often are they given the opportunity? Does your organization provide a safe environment where failure is understood to be part of the learning process? So, how can you increase the resiliency of your employees? Start by training not only for technical, but also problem-solving skills. Develop a culture that encourages communication, collaboration, and the constructive resolution of conflict. Provide a trusting, safe environment where employees won’t fear failure. Help your employees set realistic objectives and then provide the productive feedback and training necessary for them to build confidence in their ability of work through the problems and overcome the challenges they encounter.

Remove the Barriers

Brett Hoebel told us, “If I could give one tip for people – it’s not an exercise or nutrition regimen. It’s to walk your talk and believe in yourself, because at the end of the day, the dumbbell and diet don’t get you in shape. It’s your accountability to your word.” How can you remove the barriers to employee accountability? Start by modeling the behavior you want to see. Can your employees see that you are accountable to you word? Show your commitment, ownership, and resilience through your words and actions. Help employees set objectives that are realistic, give them control over their work, and then require them to account for their decisions and actions; not to instill fear, but to grow confidence and ability. Further instill accountability by giving employees the skills and control needed to respond to tough problems. And then, in the end, celebrate the victories.

Employee Morale, Engagement, Leadership, Morale, Organizational Culture, Team Building

What Do Employees Really Want?

January 29, 2015 Liz Stincelli

“Employees who believe that management is concerned about them as a whole person – not just an employee – are more productive, more satisfied, more fulfilled. Satisfied employees mean satisfied customers, which leads to profitability.” —Anne M. Mulcahy

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Why You Should Care

Why should you care about what your employees really want? As Anne M. Mulcahy stated, employees are more productive, satisfied, and fulfilled when they know you care. Studies show that 70% of employees do not feel engaged in their work. Research has shown that employees are more likely to leave their positions because of their boss than any other reason. Yet, employers tend to think that a much higher percentage of employees leave for more money than any other factor. Less than 25% of leaders have a strategy for engagement. Only 40% of employees feel they even know the goals and strategy of their organization. Engaged employees are 87% less likely to leave their positions. Organizations with happy, engaged employees have two-and-a-half times the revenue and two times the net income of organizations with unhappy, disengaged employees.

The happiness and engagement of your employees affect your success and your bottom line. This should be reason enough for you to care. So, what do employees really want? I.C.E. is a good place to start.

Inclusion

Brian Eno suggested, “You either believe that people respond to authority, or that they respond to kindness and inclusion. I’m obviously in the latter camp. I think people respond better to reward than punishment.” Your employees want to be involved in something bigger than themselves. They want to know their company mission; they want to be able to tell the world what their company is up to; to be proud of where they work. Include employees in progress and strategy meetings. Encourage them to share the great things that are happening in the organization. Let them tell the story and be ambassadors for your brand.

Concern

Chris Hemsworth explained, “People who put themselves on the line and sacrifice their own safety for the greater good and for others, and anyone in any profession whose concern is the welfare for other people instead of the individual are inspiring and important.” It doesn’t matter your position or industry, you can always put your people before yourself. Let them know that you care. Your employees want a leader who provides them with concern for the greater good, empowerment, honesty, accountability, respect, and authenticity. Show them that you have concern for their growth and capability; recognize what they’re capable of and empower them to reach their full potential. Care for them as a person, not just an employee.

Engagement

Gary Hamel believed, “The real damper on employee engagement is the soggy, cold blanket of centralized authority. In most companies, power cascades downwards from the CEO. Not only are employees disenfranchised from most policy decisions, they lack even the power to rebel against egocentric and tyrannical supervisors.” Employees want opportunities, responsibilities, and tasks that are directly related to achieving the goals and mission of the organization they work for. When employees are engaged they are more satisfied and create more value for the company. They want to be challenged and empowered to design their own tasks. When you engage your employees they will be more committed to accomplishing something valuable not only for the company, but for themselves, and their community.

Make it Happen

Ian Smith said, “I think happiness is a combination of pleasure, engagement, and meaningfulness.” Include your employees by sharing where the organization is, where it is going, and allow them to help design how to get there. Demonstrate genuine interest and concern for your employees as individuals. Show them that you care about them on a personal level, not just as an employee. Make sure they can see that you are looking out for their best interests before your own. Engage them in meaningful work that they find interesting and rewarding. Giving employees what they really want using I.C.E. is a simple step that will provide lasting reward.

Challenge, Comfort Zone, Fear, Leadership, Opportunity, Success

Breaking Out of Your Comfort Zone

January 22, 2015 Liz Stincelli

“A dream is your creative vision for your life in the future. You must break out of your current comfort zone and become comfortable with the unfamiliar and the unknown.” —Denis Waitley

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Your Comfort Zone

Why break out of your comfort zone? You will never create anything new if you don’t stretch your boundaries and break out of the status quo. Getting out of your comfort zone allows you to see new possibilities and forge a new path to achieve your goals. Your life experiences are fuller and your horizons are broader on outside. You get to define who you are and how you view opportunity. Are you going to play is safe? Or, are you going to risk it all outside of your comfort zone?

Overcome fear

Dan Stevens believed, “The comfort zone is the great enemy to creativity; moving beyond it necessitates intuition, which in turn configures new perspectives and conquers fear.” Don’t let fear prevent you from thinking in new ways and trying new things. You’ll be amazed at how resilient, capable, confident, and courageous you can become. Learn to let go of the need to be in total control. Step outside your comfort zone, set aside your fear, and try something totally different.

Welcome challenge

J.R. Martinez said, “I’ve learned in my life that it’s important to be able to step outside your comfort zone and be challenged with something you’re not familiar or accustomed to. That challenge will allow you to see what you can do.” You possess a wealth of knowledge and experience. Trust this knowledge and experience to help you confront and overcome the challenges you will face outside your comfort zone. The satisfaction you receive from successfully prevailing in light of challenge allows you to create rewarding work. If you never feel uncomfortable you are limiting your possibilities and your growth. Embrace challenge; reframe your goals so they include learning new things and exploring new experiences.

Take risks

Edward Whitacre, Jr. told us, “Be willing to step outside your comfort zone once in a while; take the risks in life that seem worth taking. The ride might not be as predictable as if you’d just planted your feet and stayed put, but it will be a heck of a lot more interesting.” Let go of the idea of perfection; it is a concept that is unattainable and causes you to avoid risk. With risk, you face the chance of failure but, also the opportunity for great success. Visualize obstacles, see yourself overcoming them, and then take the risk. You may not always win, but you will always grow.

A New Normal

Robin S. Sharma explained, “As you move outside of your comfort zone, what was once the unknown and frightening becomes your new normal.” That which is scary will eventually become comfortable. You will open yourself up to amazing new experiences. You may even meet new people and develop new relationships. You are a work in progress. Break out of your comfort zone, face your fear, overcome the challenges, and take the risk; you’ll be glad you did.

Challenge, Fear, Leadership, Perseverance, Strength, Success

Stand Strong and Persevere

January 5, 2015 Liz Stincelli

“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.” —Walter Elliot

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Perseverance

We do not succeed in a day, a week, or even a year. Success takes dedication and perseverance; and it takes it on a daily basis; day after day, week after week, and year after year. No one can do it for you; you have to do it for yourself. Stop dwelling on the negative; stand strong and persevere.

Overcome your fear

So where do you start? First, you must learn not to let fear stand in your way, causing you to give up. Charles Stanley wrote, “Fear stifles out thinking and actions. It creates indecisiveness that results in stagnation. I have known talented people who procrastinate indefinitely rather than risk failure. Lost opportunities cause erosion of confidence, and the downward spiral begins.” If you want to succeed, you must be willing to fail. Recognize that failure is not something to fear, it is only temporary; grow from it and move forward. Become courageous enough to do what you’re afraid doing. Only then will you build the resilience necessary to bounce back from defeat.

Welcome a new challenge

Summer Sanders said, “To be a champion, I think you have to see the big picture. It’s not about winning and losing; it’s about every day hard work and about thriving on a challenge.” When you learn to thrive on challenge you no longer perceive it as an obstacle to success. Take the initiative and accept the challenge to act on your biggest ideas. Develop the tenacity necessary to fight for your dreams. Every new challenge is an opportunity to get closer to achieving your goals. Step out of you comfort zone and stand strong in the face of adversity. Use challenge as an opportunity to experience, learn, and grow.

Keep moving forward

Conrad Hall explained, “You are always a student, never a master. You have to keep moving forward.” You keep moving forward when to choose to take responsibility, learn from your mistakes, and make corrections. You will never regret putting forth the effort necessary to keep moving when things get tough. When you feel stuck, try looking at things from a different point of view. You never know when all the hard work and perseverance is going to pay off so, never give up. Take stock of both your accomplishments and the lessons learned from your failures and then keep moving forward.

You Can Do It

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow told us, “Perseverance is a great element of success. If you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody.” Accept that the only person you can control is yourself. Acceptance of this fact places the responsibility for your success squarely on your shoulders. Develop courage by overcoming fear, build resiliency by welcoming a new challenge, and use the lessons you learn to keep moving you forward. Stand strong and persevere; you can do it.

Challenge, Leadership, Positive Energy, Success

Where’s Your Positive Energy?

January 5, 2015 Liz Stincelli

“When you are enthusiastic about what you do, you feel this positive energy. It’s very simple.” —Paulo Coelho

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Positive Energy

Life can be long and tedious when you get caught up in negative thinking. Negative thinking leads to negative energy and negative energy NEVER leads to success. So, how can you cultivate positive energy?

Self-Talk

Denis Waitley tells us, “Relentless, repetitive self-talk is what changes our self-image.” Words have power, especially self-talk. Start by getting rid of all the “have to”, “must”, and “should” talk. Stop telling yourself that everything has to be perfect. Tell yourself that you are equipped to overcome the obstacles you are likely to encounter. Decide that you will maintain a positive attitude despite what comes your way. Recognize and then eliminate even the slightest appearance of negative self-talk.

Reframe

Marianne Williamson explained, “Our key to transforming anything lies in our ability to reframe it.” Recognize that in life very few things in life black or white. Learn to look at situations from other perspectives and reframe the way you define your circumstances. Find the positive in people and situations. Focus on the things that make you healthy and happy and reframe to develop a positive, yet realistic view of the world.

Growth

Bo Bennett said, “Those who improve with age embrace the power of personal growth and personal achievement and begin to replace youth with wisdom, innocence with understanding, and lack of purpose with self-actualization.” What better way to foster positive energy than to know you are growing every day. Focus on what you can do instead of what you can’t do. Connect a positive meaning to the goals you are pursuing. Emphasize continual learning, growth, and real engagement in your life. Develop positive relationships that offer support in your constructive endeavors. Figure out who you are when you are at your best and then strive to be that person 100% of the time.

You Have It

Hayley Hasselhoff believed, “People dwell so much on the little things, but why should they hold you back when you have the big things to look forward to? By exuding positive energy when dealing with your problems, you will exude it in your being in general.” Focus on positive self-talk, reframe situations to view the positive, and concentrate on your personal growth. Practice small, positive steps every day. Express gratitude for who you are, your opportunities, and your experiences. Where’s your positive energy? I know you have it so let’s see it.

Leadership, Strength

Differentiate Yourself: Focus on Your Strengths

January 2, 2015 Liz Stincelli

“It does not take much strength to do things, but it requires great strength to decide on what to do.” —Elbert Hubbard

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Your Strengths

How can you differentiate yourself? Is it more constructive to focus on your areas of weakness, or should you focus on your strengths? Your strengths are what allow you to perform well. I am not talking about technical strengths because talent will only get you so far. I’m talking about the strengths that span across tasks, situations, and settings. These strengths are more motivating than your weaknesses and they give you the confidence that differentiates you from the crowd. So, how do you know where to focus?

What provides satisfaction?

Zig Ziglar explained, “Being productive gives people a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment that loafing never can.” Think about what you find fulfilling. What activities provide you with satisfaction and happiness? This is where you will find your strengths.

Is it consistent?

Arsene Wenger said, “When you look at people who are successful, you will find that they aren’t the people who are motivated, but have consistency in their motivation.” Your strengths can be seen across different situations and are consistent over time. You may find your strength lies in your resilience, integrity, honesty, agility, or perseverance. Look for the traits that you exhibit consistently regardless of circumstance, task, or setting.

How can you use it?

Denis Waitley tells us, “Don’t dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer.” Knowing your strengths can help you to understand how you fit into the big picture. In turn, when you can see the big picture you can better determine how to leverage strength. Recognizing and focusing on your strengths will impact the relationships you build, the way you work with your team, and the self-development you pursue. Your strengths will keep you motivated and help you think strategically and creatively.

Differentiate Yourself

Eleanor Roosevelt believed, “We gain strength, courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face…we must do that which we think we cannot.” The most effective tool you have for differentiating yourself is a focus on your strengths. These strengths are your assets. Does your strength lie in your ability to be a visionary? Do find satisfaction in being able to ask the right questions and solve problems? Does your strength consistently lie in planning or in rolling up your sleeves and getting the job done? Your strengths differentiate you by influencing your effectiveness at being a leader, solving problems, and working with your team. Use your strengths to overcome your fears and keep moving yourself forward. Focus on building your strengths rather than overcoming your weaknesses; it is your strengths that will set you apart from the crowd.

Culture, Employee Morale, Engagement, Habits, Leadership, Morale

Developing a Healthy Culture in 2015

December 24, 2014 Liz Stincelli

“Businesses often forget about the culture, and ultimately, they suffer for it because you can’t deliver good service from unhappy employees.” —Tony Hsieh
By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Why Culture?

As we approach the start of a new year, it’s the perfect opportunity to set a goal for developing a healthy culture in your organization in 2015. Now, of course, merely setting a goal is not nearly enough, but laying out a plan is a great starting point. While many leaders view culture as the latest buzzword in organizational leadership, the truth is, your culture may have a bigger impact on the performance of your organization than any other single factor. Culture drives success; your culture impacts your level of engagement, growth, and innovation. Your culture determines the on-the-ground actions, behaviors, and decisions of your employees. A healthy culture does not happen by accident, it is intentionally developed. So, what can you do to start developing a healthy culture in 2015?

Set the example

Rupert Murdoch told us, “In motivating people, you’ve got to engage their minds and their hearts. I motivate people, I hope, by example – and perhaps by excitement, by having productive ideas to make others feel involved.” As the leader, you are the one responsible for creating the culture in your organization. Focus on the positive behaviors you want to see in your organization and then set the example for others to follow. Show people that you value the employees at every level of the organization. Help them see that their actions and decisions have value. Communicate respectfully and authentically. Then, celebrate small achievements.

Help them grow

Benjamin Franklin believed, “Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.” If you want to have a healthy culture you must invest in the development of your employees. This shows them that they are valued. Help them to build positive self-identities. Offer them the opportunity to design their own work. Make learning something to be celebrated. Show them the trust it takes to allow them to learn from mistakes without fear. Encourage them to participate in the decision-making in your organization.

Share your values

Your culture is based on group norms of behavior; shared values are what keep those norms in place. Roy E. Disney said, “When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier.” Share your values with your employees. Help them see how these values play into the long-term focus of the organization. Then, help them understand the importance of the role they play in that focus. Once you share your values you can start to develop shared, healthy organizational habits.

Healthy Culture/Happy Employees

James Sinegal explained, “When employees are happy, they are your very best ambassadors.” Develop a healthy culture that will keep your employees happy. Set the example, help them grow, and share your values. Connect meaning and value to them as individuals and to the tasks they perform for your organization. Remember, your culture will influence the actions, behaviors, and decisions of every employee. Make intentionally developing a healthy culture in 2015 a priority and see what success you can achieve.

Communication, Engagement, Leadership, Respect

Do You Really Want to Communicate?

December 18, 2014 Liz Stincelli

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” —Tony Robbins

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Communication

Just because you are talking doesn’t mean you are communicating. Are your conversations one-sided? Are you listening with judgment? Are you so busy formulating a response that you miss the message? The point of communication is to try to create a shared perception of the world. Develop the habit of really engaging in conversation. Learn to show respect when communicating. And, recognize that, while there may be differing points of view, you can still communicate effectively.

Engage

Nelson Mandela said, “A good leader can engage in a debate frankly and thoroughly, knowing that at the end he and the other side must be closer, and thus emerge stronger.” You and the other side will never get closer to the same understanding if you do not engage in good, two-way communication. It’s difficult to have a productive conversation that is confrontational, demeaning, or judgmental. To have constructive conversations, try asking questions that will draw on a positive memory or feeling; this deepens the sense of well-being and trust. When we feel at ease we are more likely to be open to having productive conversations. Interact directly whenever possible. Make others feel like they are part of the conversation and that their input is valued. In a successful conversation both parties walk away feeling that they have been heard and have a better understanding of where the other is coming from.

Respect

Bryant H. McGill believed, “One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.” Ask others for their perspectives or personal opinions; this shows you have respect for them and their input. Share the floor. Don’t act as if it’s your way or nothing. Be confident but not arrogant when you’re communicating. Learn to paint the big picture for others and help them to see how they fit in. Have enough respect to give credit where it is due. Only speak for yourself and remain genuine and receptive. Make it clear how much you care about the success of others and that you respect and value their opinions.

Two views

Harper Lee explained, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view.” If you want to really communicate you must acknowledge that there are differences in how any two people view reality and situations. Learn to focus on what others are saying at the moment without interrupting or passing judgment. Then, confirm your understanding and ask follow-up questions. Don’t dance around uncomfortable questions, answer first and then elaborate if necessary. This open give and take is what allows you to create a shared understanding of the situation.

Make the Effort

Truman Capote stated, “A conversation is a dialogue, not a monologue. That’s why there are so few good conversations: due to scarcity, two intelligent talkers seldom meet.” In order to have good conversations you must learn to engage not lecture. You must show respect. And, you must recognize that there are two differing points of view involved in every conversation. We all find it difficult to communicate sometimes but, good conversations can happen if you are willing to make the effort.

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Why You Should Care

Inclusion

Concern

Engagement

Make it Happen

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

By Elizabeth Stincelli, DM

Employee Advocate | Leadership Consultant | Author | Speaker